This is a reflection I wrote on 23 December 2019.
I
have recently uprooted my life and moved to Ireland. At 51 years of age
an exciting and very challenging experience as I make efforts to find
work, connect with communities and “create a life” for myself in
Ireland. Part of this process is finding a parish community to connect
with. And so this week, on the fourth Sunday of Advent, I went to St
Joseph’s Church for Mass.
This
year the Sunday Advent gospel texts come from Matthew. Matthew’s gospel
tells the Christmas story from Joseph’s perspective. Matthew begins his
gospel by going through the genealogy of Joseph and Jesus. We then hear
this Sunday’s gospel reading about Joseph’s dream. Joseph’s ancestors
are in the line of David, the great King. Straight away Jesus is born
into royalty, so to speak. But Matthew also highlights that Jesus’
ancestors also have a few gentiles in the mix. At the very start of this
story of Jesus is inclusivity; a theme running through the Gospels. So
we get to the point of this fourth Sunday of Advent reading, Joseph has
to decide to take Mary as his wife. This is a controversy because Mary
is found to be with child.
I
have to admit I was a little disappointed when the priest decided to
dedicate his homily to Mary, the annunciation and the visitation after
hearing Matthew’s account of Joseph taking Mary for his wife. Joseph
often ends up in the background as Mary and Jesus take the limelight.
The other thing we often do that diminishes the Christmas story is
sanitise it, make it nice and ignore most of the real messy stuff. Let’s
focus on Joseph, this faithful man.
“…before
they came to live together [Mary] was found to be with child…” Lets
take that in for a moment. In the first century patriarchal society of
Israel/Palestine this woman was found to be pregnant. Now we know why
because Matthew tells us it was “through the Holy Spirit”. The people of
that small village didn’t know why, they only had a way-out-there
explanation from Mary, if that. So here we are, before the Christmas
story even gets underway, with a real and dangerous controversy. Poor
Joseph has to decide to call off the marriage. Who wants a partner who
has been cheating from the very beginning?
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| https://www.pinterest.com.au/pin/541346817690167431/ |
Now
Joseph has an option here to disgrace Mary. You can imagine the
alternative scene of Joseph dragging Mary out in front of family and
friends and accusing her of cheating, she is pregnant after all. The
consequence is life-threatening for Mary with the possibility of
stoning. And this would be done by any good man; it is Joseph’s right
and a matter of honour. But Joseph decided to do it “informally”,
quietly. Of course Mary would suffer but not as much. Within the first
few lines of the story we have Joseph showing his compassion and
gentleness. He disregards the possibility of gossip and considers the
needs of the other, in this case Mary. He is not overwhelmed by his need
for social standing, honour, retribution. He is level-headed and
discerning. An example to us all.
But
Joseph then goes one step further. After a dream he decides to marry
Mary. Joseph completely saves Mary from disgrace and the threat that
comes with it. How many of us would do such a thing in response to a
dream? I suspect a few of his family members may have advised him
against this. Joseph redefines being a man of “honour”. He willingly
puts himself into Mary’s mess even though he had a way out. He could
have walked away with the respect of the community.
So
the incarnation, birth of Jesus, God made man; enters history because
of this man who has honour, compassion, kindness, integrity and a deep
faith. (And Mary with her deep faith.) It is quite a challenge and takes
a certain strength to discern that God’s will might be different to
what the social and religious norms suggest. Joseph doesn’t abandon
Mary, he sees something happening here, he digs deep and discerns the
right action. He discerns God’s will. What he will eventually find out
is that this mess and controversy is in fact from God and a blessing. He
goes with his gut feeling or intuition or deep inner voice, call it
what you will, and we all benefit.
Joseph
gives us an example of being a good man, healthy masculinity if you
will. A good man has honour, care for others, compassion, contemplative
listening (he listened to his dream), discernment, strength in
gentleness and a healthy belief in himself, integrity.
As
we end chapter 1 of Matthew’s gospel Jesus is born and named. Emmanuel
(God-is-with-us) in Jesus had a wonderful role-model in Joseph. I can
imagine Joseph teaching Jesus how to be a person of faith, compassion,
honour and integrity. If only all men had Joseph as a role-model, what
sort of world would we be living in?
So this Christmas lets remember Joseph and his role in this wonderful Story, usually forgotten or overshadowed but crucial.
MERRY CHRISTMAS
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